The Homolka Debate

Posted on June 2, 2005 by Heather

There is a bit of a debate going on in Canada right now with regards to the release of Karla Homolka. In actual fact, there is a good chance that Americans may know a little more about the case then do Canadians, as there was a news blackout in effect when she and her exhusband were originally tried.

If you are interested in the background, you can read about it here: Bernardo Timeline. In short, Karla Homolka and her exhusband were accused on raping and murdering two teenage girls in 1991. In order to make sure that Bernardo, her then husband, was jailed for life, the Crown attorneys made a deal with the devil, giving Homolka only 12 years in prison for her part in the murders. There is so many unanswered questions, including what exactly was her role in the death of her sister, for which she will not be charged.

Now Homolka is due to be released on July 5th, and there is a great deal of concern. Just last year the National Parole Board ruled that she is likely to commit another violent crime. But a deal is a deal, and she is making plans to live in Quebec. Today she is in court to see what, if any, restrictions will be placed upon her once she is released.

The debate comes in here. Some people believe that she has served her time and should be released without any restrictions. Others, and I am in this camp, feel she should face restrictions, especially since she has shown no remorse and taken on no blame. My view is coloured partly because the two girls she killed were close in age to me and lived in a city very nearby. I remember clearly the fear I felt all those years ago. My parents wouldn’t let me go anywhere alone for a long time afterwards.

Although generally I believe in allowing released prisoners to live their lives, there are times when I think it is wise to place restrictions. If there is a serious risk of re-offending, as there is in this case, then I think restrictions are acceptable. I am wondering where my feelings fall with respect to the Rede. Clearly Homolka has caused a great deal of harm, to the girls she helped murder, to their family, as well as to all those who lived in fear because of her. How much punishment is enough? How much does my faith require me to forgive and to believe her protestations that she has changed are in good faith?

Interested in what other Canadians think, check out this CBC Newsworld page: Viewpoint.

2 Comments | Posted in Media & Politics |

Maybe It’s Me?

Posted on June 1, 2005 by Heather

I’m thinking about leaving my job again. I am very frustrated that I feel I have to do this. It reminds me of a friend I have. All through university he complained about the people in the various group projects he had to do. By our final year of university someone made the observation that the only thing common to each of his groups, besides his complaints, was him! What is the same with all my jobs? Me.

I partly think that I should stick it out, at least until September. But I really don’t think I can. I am tired of feeling like I have to watch every single thing I say for fear of offending someone’s overly sensitive sensibilities. (And it always the most benign things that cause the most offense.) I am also tired of being treated as if I am second class and apologizing for things that are out of my control. Most of all, I am tired of feeling like I deserve this kind of treatment.

So, what can I do? I can’t keep jumping from job to job, hoping one day I will stumble on to the prefect (or even tolerable) one. It makes me look, and feel, very flighty. The obvious first suggestion, beyond telling me to be grateful that I even have a job, is to pursue one of my dream jobs, or at least something better suited to my personality.

These jobs include librarian (need a degree), writer (give me ten years), stay-at-home mom (quanta doesn’t agree, yet), and maybe accountant (need a degree and would probably hate it too).

So what do I do? Tough it out and hope it gets better. Well, it hasn’t gotten any better in the last ten months. I’ve sent out eight resumes in the last couple of days. I think that it is time to walk away from this job while I still have a little bit of self esteem left. It is a difficult decision, because I like having my own money and I have no concrete plan for the future. But I really don’t think I can go on being treated the way I have been. No amount of money is enough to make me feel like I deserve disrespect.

2 Comments | Posted in My Life |

Baby Dreams

Posted on May 27, 2005 by Heather

An old friend of mine, who I’ve known for over 16 years, has recently had her second child. Both are beautiful little girls who I have only seen in pictures, since they live in New Brunswick. I am very happy for her, but I am also a little jealous. You see, I am 28 (!) and we have no plans anytime soon for a baby.

Sweet Dream Kitty

Some days I desperately want to have a child, and there is little doubt that I am certainly the mothering type (whatever that is). But there are other days when I’m not really sure if I want to give up the freedom I have right now for goodness knows how many years. Ultimately, I know we will have at least one child. And I know I will love him or her, and never (or rarely) regret the loss of my free time. Who knows when the day will come that quanta and I will decide to start our family, but until then, I will continue to be a little jealous of my friend and also think of baby names.*

* Silverlotus’ Baby Naming Theory – Write a list of baby names that you are considering, and take it with you to a playground, zoo, or some other place where there are many young children. Listen, and if three or more children share a name that is on your list, cross it off. Your child will likely go through school with at least two other kids with the same name. Automatically disqualified are the ever popular Emma and Cody.

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Good Luck, TW!

Posted on May 18, 2005 by Heather

Today I am sad. My favourite cross stitch designer, Teresa Wentzler, has announced that she will be shifting her focus from cross stitch designing to art work. All her plans for future designs, with one possible exception, have been put on indefinite hold.
The Castle, designed by Teresa Wentzler and stitched by Me!

Ms. Wentzler’s designs played a big part in getting me involved in cross stitching. I was never very impressed with the rough, pixelated country-type designs that I often saw in stores. But Ms. Wentzler’s beautiful fantasy designs seemed made just for me. There are few other designers (Nora Corbett of Mirabilia, her mother Marilyn Leavitt-Imblum of Told in a Garden, and Jennifer Aikman-Smith of Dragon Dreams, to name a few other of my favourite designers) who publish designs that I know I must stitch. I will miss seeing new designs from Ms. Wentzler. But if I must be honest, if I were only to stitch all the designs of her that I have already collected, I wouldn’t get through half of them in my lifetime.

I would also like to express my sympathy for Ms. Wentzler in regards to the death of her father in March. And a heartily congratulations to her brother, Andrew, who was married this past weekend.

I also look forward to have a piece of TW artwork hanging on my wall that I haven’t had to stitch for 100 hours. Instant gratification can be a good thing. 😉

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A Lazy Day

Posted on May 15, 2005 by Heather

I have made some time for me to put up my feet this weekend, literally. I’m currently balancing my notebook on my knees as my cold feeties rest on the coffee table. The weather has turned damp and cool this weekend, and I am very content to sit in front of the TV and relax. Right now I am watching the UK version of the Antiques Roadshow, and coveting a woman’s beautiful ivory writing box.

Earlier today I cleared off my bookshelves and rearranged my books to make room for some new accusations. I also updated my book database in MS Access, and added a few more books to my Amazon wish list. Tonight I’d like to maybe play a game, or maybe read a book. I am trying to realize that I don’t always have to be writing, thinking about something profound, or cleaning the house. Once in a while I can sit down and do nothing. The only way to help maintain my sanity and health is to reduce unnecessary stress.

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Seller Beware

Posted on May 5, 2005 by Heather

Well, I’ve finally had enough of PayPal and eBay. A few days ago I got an email from PayPal saying that some money I had received came from fraudulent funds. (It was a real email, not a spoof.) When I tried to reply, the email bounced. Today I was finally able to talk to someone on the phone and I was told that I was out the money and the item, and I had to pay back the amount to PayPal. So, where exactly am I supposed to find $69.99 to pay them back? And what about my item, which actually was slightly meaningful to me. The entire situation has soured my feelings towards both PayPal and eBay. They seem to care a great deal more about buyers then sellers. The seller who purchased from me has bought many items recently, and there appears to be no action being taken against them. How many people has she scam ed, and how many more will she scam before her account is closed?

Once I have exhausted all avenues, of which there are very few, I will closing both my PayPal and eBay accounts. And I would also like to strongly warn everyone that if you are selling items on eBay, be sure you are covered by seller protection, otherwise you may end up being out money like I am. (I was actually told by the less then helpful customer service person that when I saw the transaction was not cover, I should have returned the funds to the buyer.)

Perhaps “Buyer Beware” should be updated to “Buyer and Seller Beware”.

1 Comment | Posted in The Outside World |

My Body’s Wisdom

Posted on April 30, 2005 by Heather

I love my body and trust its wisdom.

Considering my Zodiac sign of Taurus is perhaps the most down-to-earth and body-conscious sign, it is somewhat surprising that I have such a distant and tenuous relationship with my body. Because of my constant knee pain, I have often felt like it is betraying me. I have issues keeping my weight as low as I would like, and I frequently walk into things.

Okay, I’m sure part of the problem is that I have cravings for sweets and that I am a little more clumsy then the average person. But since I began physiotherapy and started to pay more attention to my body, I have found our “relationship” improving. I am more aware of what hurts and why, as well as the way my muscles stretch and move.

Although I have not completely restarted my yoga practice, I do find the poses I occasionally do to be much more effective. I am hoping that practicing yoga more regularly, along with a better diet, continued physiotherapy, and work with my charkas (especially the first and fourth) will help me to continue to build an excellent relationship with my body.

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